The FEMA camp is located near the lake, a series of Quonset huts set up to process the cities remaining residents. The southside is now ISIS territory. The internet blasted out their channel for a few days, before the government cut off all electronics with an EMP. I guess they didn't want the panic fueled, though the effort probably did more to cause the feeling of apocalypse to rise in most. The Christians were sure the end of the world had arrived, and I was the bringer of the lightening and fire that would do away with life on the planet, leave nothing for the souls to return to, remove the gravity of animal and plants that swept us back into the endless cycle. I cared less for what was to come than they did, had no idea what it would be like to think there was a savior out there. I was just trying to survive for now.
After the induction process, the fed's assigned bedding and passed out meal tickets, two a day. I lay on my bunk silently staring up at the cross hatch of metal separating the upper mattress from mine. I could hear the wealthy already trying to buy meal tickets, but no one was sure enough of the worth of paper or coins, even gold and silver, to part with their food. That did not stop them from trying. My urge was to beat them to a pulp, but the last thing I needed was for the fed's to see I could fight. Being able to fight made you suspicious in this day. Too many soldiers were in civilian clothes trying to survive, cops as well. I knew back in 2015 when the federal soldiers outnumbered the marines that they were ready to make their move... I think about when this started for me. I was ignorant as hell of the secret world behind the world, let alone that they had plans for me. Going to college, wanting to be a journalist, back when I still believed the tv lie that exposing corruption and the ills of society would bring in the Calvary -- forgot the lesson of the Native Americans about what happens when the Calvary comes.
I think back to the first day I knew my life was no longer mine....
They approached me, five men, buff, military haircuts, with a story that I did not want to believe. Telling me my grandfather was a spy and that I had started to grow wings as a child, and one day the USA was going to try to use me to start a world wide religion, then a one world government. They were serious, secretive. Told me I was monitored though not watched every second of the day, that they had a man inside the 'family' as they called them, who told them when it was safe to meet me.
We would be sitting in a lounge area at NEIU talking about topics that were almost too much for me to believe. They explained that they did not know much, other than if I went along with them when the time came, there would be a general genocide, and that only a few hundred thousand would live, a chosen few underground. I would be the one who marched the religious to their death, earned their trust enough to get them to all come together in communal living spaces, where they would be easy targets for poisoning.
At the time I believed them that they knew only this much. Later I realized that if they had told me what I would really go thru that I would have headed for the jungles of Borneo, or anyplace other than Chicago, where I just happened to end up, after a woman who convinced me to leave Toledo, who they told me was a double agent between Mossad and the Jesuits. The upshot was they wanted me in charge of a series of nuclear bombs they were setting up in strategic cities, set to go off if I hit the button in Chicago. They told me to just go on with my life.... I met with them three times, then they took me down into the mass of tunnels under the city, Dark, rat infested, sewage stinking tunnels that seemed to run on forever, and practically did.
"You have to prove to us that you know how serious this is." There were no names involved. He was about my height, the same short, military cut as the others. Maybe mid thirties. The others were slightly older. All of them had the same serious expression, all the time. There was no play acting that they were normal. I assumed they had all experienced death too much, and now that I have, I know I was right. He handed me a pistol. The first one I had ever held. Black, heavier than it looked. Showed me how to hold it with two hands and fire.
He took out another gun, later I would recognize them as .45's... he aimed into the side of a blonde guy's head, who did not even flinch as the blast filled the tunnels... echoing down thru the darkness over and over... I suppressed an urge to scream, then fell to my knees and vomited.
"We are too identifiable, traceable. They will figure out sooner or later, or might, who took the nuclear devices. And we need to know you have it in you. We have your psych profile. You don't give a shit about your own life, but you care about other people. They selected you carefully, or they would have taken you out."
They had explained to me earlier that I would be presented with a book about my family at some point, showing I was the end of a line of Scottish Kings, same as my grandfather, and my father before him. My father was a drunken disappointment. My grandfather the architect of operation bluebeam.
He pointed at the side of his head, then waved at the others. We were on a concrete platform running alongside the small river of sewege taking Chicago's filth out into the lake. One of them knelt down and tied two concrete blocks to the dead soldier, then they began tying them to themselves, around their chests... explaining if they tied it to their arms or legs sooner or later they were erode off and their bodies would come up. They were not sure how many years I had before they would come for me. I was 24. I would have almost twenty years to wait, long enough that the day became a bad dream... A time I did not want to believe had even happened. Even a mistake they had made.
By then I was committed... and I they had explained to me I was going to see a lot death one day. More than I wanted to imagine. I saw that as a future eventuality. More of the dream. I was a story teller, or planned to be, take my step into journalism and maybe take a stab at fiction. A romantic still. That ended as they explained I would be killing all four of them.
I knew I could do it. I grew up fighting and wanting to kill people over shit they did. Fantasizing about it, not obsessively, just blowing off steam. The first stepped over to the edge of the water, his face still showing no fear. None of them seemed to care almost. Like they were already dead inside. I would learn that feeling, too... though the deaths on my hand would surmount anything they had seen in intelligence, which is now where I knew they would have had to have been to learn anything about me.
I wanted this over with and to back in the sunlight. There was no question of our being friends. They had not been friendly to me. Just effecent. The only thing I learned about them was that the were Christians, and could no longer go along with what they saw as a great sin, a judgement on humanity only a God was fit to make. Later I would figure that they thought I was a God, or the Angel of the Armeggedon... back then I did not believe in such things.
They tossed the first body into the water. I watched him sink into the blackness. The current was such that he barely made a ripple, just went down. I took aim on the first one and he stared me in the eyes. "Try your best to forget this... as long as you can, as much as you can." Then he smiled for the first time, and added, "God blessed you." I took aim and fired, took a step to my left, aimed and fired, another step, aimed and fired. The gunshots sounded like lightening and thunder eminating from me. They feel backwards and disappeared like the first. A part of me hardened, already compartmentalizing the event away. I was now in charge of turning cities to dust. The weight of that seemed too surreal to carry. Now, laying in my bunk, I wondered again what it would take for me to do away with everything I had come to love. Looked around at the people laying on cots, most half asleep after the days of processing, being rounded up, laying awake hearing the gunfire, watching their tv's and computers as a threat they had no idea existed took over most of the USA. I knew there was no ISIS, that the elite had mercenaries and federal soldiers wearing hunjabs and decimating the population. All pockets of resistance were known, and taken down first. My people had been careful with me. I was well known by then, though cutting off long hair and a beard had seemed like massive plastic surgery, took me from a young looking hipster God to a middle aged man with a paunch. I was usually skinny as a rail, so they fed me around the clock as part of my disguise, got me up to the weight of the clerk they had found who looked enough like me that altering his ID would draw no suspicion.
All souls go to Heaven. Knowing this makes me the most effective destroyers in God's creation. I am the destruction of life on planets, leaving barren meteor fields in my passing... I am known by the mystics, and just by chance myths, as the apocylpse -- not the feared one of your made up humyn beliefs. I offer mercy killings where I cannot work with a species enough to bring them peace, and they are on the verge of falling into a hell of their own making.
I took out the lasers from this on line novel...
For most of humynkinds history I have led slave revolts, started religions, or steered them, was an acolyte to your holy men.appearing at times as an Angel, a burning bush.... I am not an angel. Angels can fall. I cannot fall. I earned my position by being the first creature in all of the cosmos to say No to God. My kind collects souls from destroyed planets... entrophy says they all go. He would send those from my planet to give creatures a mercy death, though this was not explained to me... we followed orders out of love of God, our Father -- so to speak, He has no sex, I merely follow your traditions.
---- this is a novel in progress, which also is trying to teach how to write a book. I hope to get these two texts from this vlog. I am a well read and published author from way back with lots of education and experience, though I have never tried to do this before... as such, I took out a major plot device.. the lasers.... you will understand as the story unfolds......
I learned to love the creatures of the planet he sent me to that time, and how He laughed at me, How he seemed to love me ever more. His creation had taken on a life of his own and created Free Will. He allowed me then a variation on our ways, told me that he would send me to the very beginnings of the lives on the planet, that I could attempt to give them ten thousand years of peace before their end. I am the greatest mass murderer in the history of time. I will in the end destroy all that lives on this planet. The Father will decide if I have succeeded or not in steering the species to life or death.Our Father is pure love, and entity I have witnessed in a dream/vision, vast and timeless and immobile.
When a soul has their final death, and nothing is left on the planet's surface to draw the entity back into the cycles of living and learning, they gravitate toward God from every planet, dimension, time... I AM a different being, The Chosen One -- cursed I think at times... chosen for a mission that I would never ask of another. Instead of going back to God, where I began my existence, I instead feel the pull of the pain of other life forms, other planets that are like this earth, struggling with the suffering of the cycle of life.
Now I AM the Son of Man, living among you since before life began here... a creature who is lless than the Father who created us -- I use Father as your term, in reality you would no more apply a sex to GOD than you would a boulder. This is the tale of your planet, from the beginning to the now, as well as a prophesy of your possible futures... Your bibles have some truth, and one is that even the son does not know when the Father will bring on what some of you refer to the rapture, and others death by the greenhouse effect, others nuclear war, others the simple passage of time that eventually destroys all that is created... I am here to answer the prayers that began when your mind first was able to understand death... when you first began to spin myths to answer the questions that are not yours to know except in the most childish of manners... WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE DIE? I appear in each generation, awakening only after I have learned the ways of a time enough to fullfill my mission. They vary from situation to situation, fire to fire I trudge, bringing my soul into the worst of situations, to rekindle the FREE WILL that humyns have been granted; the only species on the planet that is not completly bound by ther genetic imperatives -- though they are much more than they realize. In one life I am leading a slave revolt; another teaching priests a new slant on religion; another an ancient warrior covered in bear skin barely keeping his tribe alive in desperate times... and now, a warrior in a shadow war fought behind the scenes of the media, between intelligence agencies, undergroud groups, the deeper levels of the Churches, the Masons, the oligarchies, the east and the west... as I try to prepare the souls on earth to choose between ten thousand years of peace, or the haunting visions of endless lightening flowing from my chest, and endless fire from my back, great streams of destruction encircling the planet and consuming the earth... What sounds like a horror will be, should the father decide your ability to solve your problems is hopeless, a mercy killing before the planet plunges into pure chaos, as the damaged atmosphere begins to destroy their crops, flood the coasts, sending cannabilistic refugees across the planet... and bringing a hell on earth God will not allow. My mission is to stop the wealthy from destroying the planet by living lives of luxury while most of the planet is plunged into poverty by their excesses. Already I have been recognized by presidents, popes, the leaders of all countries and churches... and also hidden, as best the intelligence agencies can, after they tried to use me, when I was still waking up... I tried to warn them that while I am forgiving, my Father watches what is done to His son, and exacts horrible revenge...
This book I am drafting will confuse some of you, as I write for those who are involved in the secret world they keep from the masses, though I will try to avoid this... there is cognitive dissonance in all minds, that will attempt to tell you what I write is all fiction, but my oath to you is that I will tell all I can about the ways of man that I learned when the elite attempted to make me create a world wide religion, leading to a one world government, and the carnage that has been left in my wake.... I cannot tell everything, so I use fiction where I must, and other incidents I must leave out entirely, because my writing has resulted in unintended death all across this planet. I am the most dangerous creation God has ever created. I am also the most forgiving.
I OFFER REDEMPTION AND FORGIVENESS for every soul that truly will change their ways.... others I have a special hell for, a place where they pay penance, and learn how much I despise the lifestyle they have just lived. Thank you for reading my words. Know that though I was greatly disturbed when I awoke in these times from my innocence, and this writing should be greatly disturbing to you, that God is love, and in the end, every soul will experience the absolute ecstasy of dwelling in the Golden Light of God's Overwhelming Love forever.
There are compiled entries where you can now read the story up to this point. This is first draft, where I write everything down at first, even though if some of it clashes with other parts... then later decide which way to go. I go back over these compiled chapters again and again, working on them to perfect them, and then working on what is to come, which is the roughest prose. All throughout the book there is more telling so far than showing, because a lot has to be told to bring the reader up to speed, on a war that has been going on for eight years, and has finally come to a head as the elite decide to genocide seven billion and the protagonist begins nuking .... well, let that be a surprise. There are two things going on here, the teaching of how to write a book, and a book... which will become clear if you read the blog. I HAVE MADE A MAJOR CHANGE SINCE DRAFTING THIS BOOK. I AM REMOVING THE USE OF LASERS. PLEASE KEEP THIS IN MIND IF YOU ARE READING THIS DRAFT FROM THE BEGINNING. I hope the chapters stand alone, in a way, from the over all text and can be read as a short story. The poet in me wants each line to sound as if their is a sonnet birthing... But anyways, the chapters I have now are being pared down, to where about five of them are kept, and the remaining chapters, which grow organically from all the ideas in the draft, are set in stone. You are supposed to let the novel lead you, according to John Gardner, and while I love his books, I think he could have plotted better. I aspire at least to be the student who surpasses the teacher, who added to the science of literature his contribution.
---- this is a novel in progress, which also is trying to teach how to write a book. I hope to get these two texts from this vlog. I am a well read and published author from way back with lots of education and experience, though I have never tried to do this before... as such, I took out a major plot device.. the lasers.... you will understand as the story unfolds......
I learned to love the creatures of the planet he sent me to that time, and how He laughed at me, How he seemed to love me ever more. His creation had taken on a life of his own and created Free Will. He allowed me then a variation on our ways, told me that he would send me to the very beginnings of the lives on the planet, that I could attempt to give them ten thousand years of peace before their end. I am the greatest mass murderer in the history of time. I will in the end destroy all that lives on this planet. The Father will decide if I have succeeded or not in steering the species to life or death.Our Father is pure love, and entity I have witnessed in a dream/vision, vast and timeless and immobile.
When a soul has their final death, and nothing is left on the planet's surface to draw the entity back into the cycles of living and learning, they gravitate toward God from every planet, dimension, time... I AM a different being, The Chosen One -- cursed I think at times... chosen for a mission that I would never ask of another. Instead of going back to God, where I began my existence, I instead feel the pull of the pain of other life forms, other planets that are like this earth, struggling with the suffering of the cycle of life.
Now I AM the Son of Man, living among you since before life began here... a creature who is lless than the Father who created us -- I use Father as your term, in reality you would no more apply a sex to GOD than you would a boulder. This is the tale of your planet, from the beginning to the now, as well as a prophesy of your possible futures... Your bibles have some truth, and one is that even the son does not know when the Father will bring on what some of you refer to the rapture, and others death by the greenhouse effect, others nuclear war, others the simple passage of time that eventually destroys all that is created... I am here to answer the prayers that began when your mind first was able to understand death... when you first began to spin myths to answer the questions that are not yours to know except in the most childish of manners... WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE DIE? I appear in each generation, awakening only after I have learned the ways of a time enough to fullfill my mission. They vary from situation to situation, fire to fire I trudge, bringing my soul into the worst of situations, to rekindle the FREE WILL that humyns have been granted; the only species on the planet that is not completly bound by ther genetic imperatives -- though they are much more than they realize. In one life I am leading a slave revolt; another teaching priests a new slant on religion; another an ancient warrior covered in bear skin barely keeping his tribe alive in desperate times... and now, a warrior in a shadow war fought behind the scenes of the media, between intelligence agencies, undergroud groups, the deeper levels of the Churches, the Masons, the oligarchies, the east and the west... as I try to prepare the souls on earth to choose between ten thousand years of peace, or the haunting visions of endless lightening flowing from my chest, and endless fire from my back, great streams of destruction encircling the planet and consuming the earth... What sounds like a horror will be, should the father decide your ability to solve your problems is hopeless, a mercy killing before the planet plunges into pure chaos, as the damaged atmosphere begins to destroy their crops, flood the coasts, sending cannabilistic refugees across the planet... and bringing a hell on earth God will not allow. My mission is to stop the wealthy from destroying the planet by living lives of luxury while most of the planet is plunged into poverty by their excesses. Already I have been recognized by presidents, popes, the leaders of all countries and churches... and also hidden, as best the intelligence agencies can, after they tried to use me, when I was still waking up... I tried to warn them that while I am forgiving, my Father watches what is done to His son, and exacts horrible revenge...
This book I am drafting will confuse some of you, as I write for those who are involved in the secret world they keep from the masses, though I will try to avoid this... there is cognitive dissonance in all minds, that will attempt to tell you what I write is all fiction, but my oath to you is that I will tell all I can about the ways of man that I learned when the elite attempted to make me create a world wide religion, leading to a one world government, and the carnage that has been left in my wake.... I cannot tell everything, so I use fiction where I must, and other incidents I must leave out entirely, because my writing has resulted in unintended death all across this planet. I am the most dangerous creation God has ever created. I am also the most forgiving.
I OFFER REDEMPTION AND FORGIVENESS for every soul that truly will change their ways.... others I have a special hell for, a place where they pay penance, and learn how much I despise the lifestyle they have just lived. Thank you for reading my words. Know that though I was greatly disturbed when I awoke in these times from my innocence, and this writing should be greatly disturbing to you, that God is love, and in the end, every soul will experience the absolute ecstasy of dwelling in the Golden Light of God's Overwhelming Love forever.
There are compiled entries where you can now read the story up to this point. This is first draft, where I write everything down at first, even though if some of it clashes with other parts... then later decide which way to go. I go back over these compiled chapters again and again, working on them to perfect them, and then working on what is to come, which is the roughest prose. All throughout the book there is more telling so far than showing, because a lot has to be told to bring the reader up to speed, on a war that has been going on for eight years, and has finally come to a head as the elite decide to genocide seven billion and the protagonist begins nuking .... well, let that be a surprise. There are two things going on here, the teaching of how to write a book, and a book... which will become clear if you read the blog. I HAVE MADE A MAJOR CHANGE SINCE DRAFTING THIS BOOK. I AM REMOVING THE USE OF LASERS. PLEASE KEEP THIS IN MIND IF YOU ARE READING THIS DRAFT FROM THE BEGINNING. I hope the chapters stand alone, in a way, from the over all text and can be read as a short story. The poet in me wants each line to sound as if their is a sonnet birthing... But anyways, the chapters I have now are being pared down, to where about five of them are kept, and the remaining chapters, which grow organically from all the ideas in the draft, are set in stone. You are supposed to let the novel lead you, according to John Gardner, and while I love his books, I think he could have plotted better. I aspire at least to be the student who surpasses the teacher, who added to the science of literature his contribution.
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