If I started saying I was sorry to all the people I owe a sorry to...
my mouth would speak no other words
If I starting saying everyone I am grateful to in this world
my mouth would speak no other words
I will fight your idea of Satan being supreme over THE CHRIST
Ths Satanists adhere to a false religion that allows their behavior
the dark sacrifices of war
the rape of children
the stealing from a congregation to live high on that hog,
up there where camels can't get thru the eyes of needles;
but they can I guess
Behavior wise I will always look to what is logical and wonder why these steps
are not taken
Why we do not stop the environmental destruction
why are we so afraid of citizens
finding out what the government is doing
Am I the fallen angel now to your perceptions?
I see two new tv shows showing sympathy for the devil
Interesting takes...
NO ONE IS GOING TO HELP YOU...
I am told one night after waiting for help for six long years
No one cares about how this is making you feel...
I am told by another
Look at this carnage and all you can do is ask why...
operation bluebeam went awry
set up and used and abused just needed to know why
found out oh thank God I found out...
I would not accept the power that went with the creature you thought I was
The lie was too huge for me to tell
All good and well to live this weird life which was referenced to occasionally
in ways that seemed pure slander to me
Too many things I would have done differently
Had I known....
Had I known...
they sold people a webcam into my home
There is no way I could have predicted any of this
This was too far from the world I believed in for me to be a part
I was a watcher... seeing thru the tv what you could afford to tell me
and everyone else
I will never have another life
the question you asked me... if I left would there be trouble?
A disabled man with no money being asked a question like that was troubling to me
you thought I wanted to be poor you thought I wanted to be rich
I want tobe comfortable/I have worked my ass off, too... tried not even knowing
how I could help what I could do
Those of you behind the propaganda know I am innocent
of all but being ignorant to how you were trying to use me
I showed my ugliest sides against yours/YOU DREW FIRST BLOOD
WITH ME THAT IS GOING TO CAUSE A RIVER TO FLOW FROM YOU
This you have seen in twisted ways the world works
I do not want your life... or your minds
I did not even know you had jumped
a young man in a tie is telling me that my idea of how to protest
has been turned into an outline for guerrilla war
The fight I thought all my own and losing badly
or winning AT TIMES though since it was just some fucking tv show...
The time and effort you put would brng tears to my eyes if the taunts of idiots had
not effected my ability to realease emotions by crying
There was so many of your in the background
bearing weights I would have never asked from you, though My Father did
using men I would not have used
he knows though
REPEMPTION IS THE ONLY SIGN OF SPIRITUAL GROWTH
noticing your faults and trying to redeem yourselves...
we all need redemption
forget to go here and your ego will take over and tell you LIES
when I heard of the soldiers out there
I was taken aback that no one still came to get me
I still did not know enough
I barely believed anything was happening
because it so seldom touched my life\
so much is mere coincidence I once thought?
Now I know I needed a lot of time to ponder
to learn to swim
before you threw me into deep water
you kept asking me to prove myself
I kept going along with you
want to argue why you cannot make the case that I can love people I do not understand?
For a mass murderer to react bt collaposing on the floor and saying,
YOU ARE BLAMING ME WITH MURDER? I love everybody
You had put a mask on me that looked othing like me at all.
I HAVE TRIED TO LIVE AN HONEST LIFE...
I MAY HAVE USED WORDS TO LIE
BUT I REMAINED TRUE TO ENGRAINED MORALS
THROUGHOUT MY LIFE
I COMMITTED TO ART
AS A DO OR DIE PROPOSITION
WAR IS DECEPTION
Lao Tzo
arguement is deception
love is deception
society is a decoeption
God is a deception
You are tricked about God all the time
The Pagan holidays hidden under Roman Catholic sanctioned events
the birth and ressurection
the seasons, a bright moment in the sun, death for a awhile, then life again
a pattern that we share with squirrels and bears
the harvest and the planting
I used to talk in front of the webcams about the old religions
I would remember times when I was a brutal warrior cutting the heart out of an enemy
biting into it raw, talling my soldiers this would give me their strenthg. DIDN not matter if it was true or not, if they believed it they would defeat the enemy that matters most in war-- FEAR.
I went after education like a hungry ghost with a stomach to huge to fill
I went after love and I went after madness and stablity
I was never going to sell out,
that was my relgion
I would live a decent life by my own principles
true to myself and my God as much as possible
plenty of mistakes but mostly wins
The naive belief that if I was famous I could sell my signature and make money for charity
This was the mad crazed view point I had of the world
Then I was told I was on the stand for mass murder
that a tv show which seemed to be mimicking my writing, as many did
showed violence during them, and I would never connect that with my work
I was just writing what I did not like, my opinion, like everyone has, but that does not mean I truly want ill will done to these people. When I heard of group after group being targeted I was completly a listener to a story I did not have enough knowledge to process. I was not privvy to the vital intelligence needed, because you thought I would... well, do as I did, and say, FUCK NO, I AM NOT DOING THAT... which is what my remark would have been,.
I have felt as if I am sitting on a powder barrel chainsmoking cigarettes for too many years
The struggle to find what we can of Heaven on earth is beyond me at the moment
A popular song of the year says confess and get your stomach slashed
and the only heaven
is between his woman's legs
I think of this and how badly I wanted that war I heard about to end
I knew there was no way I was going to be able to lead you from where I was
I was never given that chance to speak clearly about my ideas
I had to be watched and studied and examined
I do not envy you having to that, do not envy me the feeling of having your life constantly examined
I became a mirror for you/a bible of vague lines/babblery
did'nt know enough to do anything other than try to put out fires and tell you who I am
This I would not do because I hated being watched, hated all the people saying this happened
showing that or ....
i learned about celebrity egos than I guess
I was bullied into fighting and fought.
When you described how you saw me man the fucking horror, the horror
Same panic rages right back with the writing of these words
All souls go to Heaven. Knowing this makes me the most effective destroyers in God's creation. I am the destruction of life on planets, leaving barren meteor fields in my passing... I am known by the mystics, and just by chance myths, as the apocylpse -- not the feared one of your made up humyn beliefs. I offer mercy killings where I cannot work with a species enough to bring them peace, and they are on the verge of falling into a hell of their own making.
I took out the lasers from this on line novel...
For most of humynkinds history I have led slave revolts, started religions, or steered them, was an acolyte to your holy men.appearing at times as an Angel, a burning bush.... I am not an angel. Angels can fall. I cannot fall. I earned my position by being the first creature in all of the cosmos to say No to God. My kind collects souls from destroyed planets... entrophy says they all go. He would send those from my planet to give creatures a mercy death, though this was not explained to me... we followed orders out of love of God, our Father -- so to speak, He has no sex, I merely follow your traditions.
---- this is a novel in progress, which also is trying to teach how to write a book. I hope to get these two texts from this vlog. I am a well read and published author from way back with lots of education and experience, though I have never tried to do this before... as such, I took out a major plot device.. the lasers.... you will understand as the story unfolds......
I learned to love the creatures of the planet he sent me to that time, and how He laughed at me, How he seemed to love me ever more. His creation had taken on a life of his own and created Free Will. He allowed me then a variation on our ways, told me that he would send me to the very beginnings of the lives on the planet, that I could attempt to give them ten thousand years of peace before their end. I am the greatest mass murderer in the history of time. I will in the end destroy all that lives on this planet. The Father will decide if I have succeeded or not in steering the species to life or death.Our Father is pure love, and entity I have witnessed in a dream/vision, vast and timeless and immobile.
When a soul has their final death, and nothing is left on the planet's surface to draw the entity back into the cycles of living and learning, they gravitate toward God from every planet, dimension, time... I AM a different being, The Chosen One -- cursed I think at times... chosen for a mission that I would never ask of another. Instead of going back to God, where I began my existence, I instead feel the pull of the pain of other life forms, other planets that are like this earth, struggling with the suffering of the cycle of life.
Now I AM the Son of Man, living among you since before life began here... a creature who is lless than the Father who created us -- I use Father as your term, in reality you would no more apply a sex to GOD than you would a boulder. This is the tale of your planet, from the beginning to the now, as well as a prophesy of your possible futures... Your bibles have some truth, and one is that even the son does not know when the Father will bring on what some of you refer to the rapture, and others death by the greenhouse effect, others nuclear war, others the simple passage of time that eventually destroys all that is created... I am here to answer the prayers that began when your mind first was able to understand death... when you first began to spin myths to answer the questions that are not yours to know except in the most childish of manners... WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE DIE? I appear in each generation, awakening only after I have learned the ways of a time enough to fullfill my mission. They vary from situation to situation, fire to fire I trudge, bringing my soul into the worst of situations, to rekindle the FREE WILL that humyns have been granted; the only species on the planet that is not completly bound by ther genetic imperatives -- though they are much more than they realize. In one life I am leading a slave revolt; another teaching priests a new slant on religion; another an ancient warrior covered in bear skin barely keeping his tribe alive in desperate times... and now, a warrior in a shadow war fought behind the scenes of the media, between intelligence agencies, undergroud groups, the deeper levels of the Churches, the Masons, the oligarchies, the east and the west... as I try to prepare the souls on earth to choose between ten thousand years of peace, or the haunting visions of endless lightening flowing from my chest, and endless fire from my back, great streams of destruction encircling the planet and consuming the earth... What sounds like a horror will be, should the father decide your ability to solve your problems is hopeless, a mercy killing before the planet plunges into pure chaos, as the damaged atmosphere begins to destroy their crops, flood the coasts, sending cannabilistic refugees across the planet... and bringing a hell on earth God will not allow. My mission is to stop the wealthy from destroying the planet by living lives of luxury while most of the planet is plunged into poverty by their excesses. Already I have been recognized by presidents, popes, the leaders of all countries and churches... and also hidden, as best the intelligence agencies can, after they tried to use me, when I was still waking up... I tried to warn them that while I am forgiving, my Father watches what is done to His son, and exacts horrible revenge...
This book I am drafting will confuse some of you, as I write for those who are involved in the secret world they keep from the masses, though I will try to avoid this... there is cognitive dissonance in all minds, that will attempt to tell you what I write is all fiction, but my oath to you is that I will tell all I can about the ways of man that I learned when the elite attempted to make me create a world wide religion, leading to a one world government, and the carnage that has been left in my wake.... I cannot tell everything, so I use fiction where I must, and other incidents I must leave out entirely, because my writing has resulted in unintended death all across this planet. I am the most dangerous creation God has ever created. I am also the most forgiving.
I OFFER REDEMPTION AND FORGIVENESS for every soul that truly will change their ways.... others I have a special hell for, a place where they pay penance, and learn how much I despise the lifestyle they have just lived. Thank you for reading my words. Know that though I was greatly disturbed when I awoke in these times from my innocence, and this writing should be greatly disturbing to you, that God is love, and in the end, every soul will experience the absolute ecstasy of dwelling in the Golden Light of God's Overwhelming Love forever.
There are compiled entries where you can now read the story up to this point. This is first draft, where I write everything down at first, even though if some of it clashes with other parts... then later decide which way to go. I go back over these compiled chapters again and again, working on them to perfect them, and then working on what is to come, which is the roughest prose. All throughout the book there is more telling so far than showing, because a lot has to be told to bring the reader up to speed, on a war that has been going on for eight years, and has finally come to a head as the elite decide to genocide seven billion and the protagonist begins nuking .... well, let that be a surprise. There are two things going on here, the teaching of how to write a book, and a book... which will become clear if you read the blog. I HAVE MADE A MAJOR CHANGE SINCE DRAFTING THIS BOOK. I AM REMOVING THE USE OF LASERS. PLEASE KEEP THIS IN MIND IF YOU ARE READING THIS DRAFT FROM THE BEGINNING. I hope the chapters stand alone, in a way, from the over all text and can be read as a short story. The poet in me wants each line to sound as if their is a sonnet birthing... But anyways, the chapters I have now are being pared down, to where about five of them are kept, and the remaining chapters, which grow organically from all the ideas in the draft, are set in stone. You are supposed to let the novel lead you, according to John Gardner, and while I love his books, I think he could have plotted better. I aspire at least to be the student who surpasses the teacher, who added to the science of literature his contribution.
---- this is a novel in progress, which also is trying to teach how to write a book. I hope to get these two texts from this vlog. I am a well read and published author from way back with lots of education and experience, though I have never tried to do this before... as such, I took out a major plot device.. the lasers.... you will understand as the story unfolds......
I learned to love the creatures of the planet he sent me to that time, and how He laughed at me, How he seemed to love me ever more. His creation had taken on a life of his own and created Free Will. He allowed me then a variation on our ways, told me that he would send me to the very beginnings of the lives on the planet, that I could attempt to give them ten thousand years of peace before their end. I am the greatest mass murderer in the history of time. I will in the end destroy all that lives on this planet. The Father will decide if I have succeeded or not in steering the species to life or death.Our Father is pure love, and entity I have witnessed in a dream/vision, vast and timeless and immobile.
When a soul has their final death, and nothing is left on the planet's surface to draw the entity back into the cycles of living and learning, they gravitate toward God from every planet, dimension, time... I AM a different being, The Chosen One -- cursed I think at times... chosen for a mission that I would never ask of another. Instead of going back to God, where I began my existence, I instead feel the pull of the pain of other life forms, other planets that are like this earth, struggling with the suffering of the cycle of life.
Now I AM the Son of Man, living among you since before life began here... a creature who is lless than the Father who created us -- I use Father as your term, in reality you would no more apply a sex to GOD than you would a boulder. This is the tale of your planet, from the beginning to the now, as well as a prophesy of your possible futures... Your bibles have some truth, and one is that even the son does not know when the Father will bring on what some of you refer to the rapture, and others death by the greenhouse effect, others nuclear war, others the simple passage of time that eventually destroys all that is created... I am here to answer the prayers that began when your mind first was able to understand death... when you first began to spin myths to answer the questions that are not yours to know except in the most childish of manners... WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE DIE? I appear in each generation, awakening only after I have learned the ways of a time enough to fullfill my mission. They vary from situation to situation, fire to fire I trudge, bringing my soul into the worst of situations, to rekindle the FREE WILL that humyns have been granted; the only species on the planet that is not completly bound by ther genetic imperatives -- though they are much more than they realize. In one life I am leading a slave revolt; another teaching priests a new slant on religion; another an ancient warrior covered in bear skin barely keeping his tribe alive in desperate times... and now, a warrior in a shadow war fought behind the scenes of the media, between intelligence agencies, undergroud groups, the deeper levels of the Churches, the Masons, the oligarchies, the east and the west... as I try to prepare the souls on earth to choose between ten thousand years of peace, or the haunting visions of endless lightening flowing from my chest, and endless fire from my back, great streams of destruction encircling the planet and consuming the earth... What sounds like a horror will be, should the father decide your ability to solve your problems is hopeless, a mercy killing before the planet plunges into pure chaos, as the damaged atmosphere begins to destroy their crops, flood the coasts, sending cannabilistic refugees across the planet... and bringing a hell on earth God will not allow. My mission is to stop the wealthy from destroying the planet by living lives of luxury while most of the planet is plunged into poverty by their excesses. Already I have been recognized by presidents, popes, the leaders of all countries and churches... and also hidden, as best the intelligence agencies can, after they tried to use me, when I was still waking up... I tried to warn them that while I am forgiving, my Father watches what is done to His son, and exacts horrible revenge...
This book I am drafting will confuse some of you, as I write for those who are involved in the secret world they keep from the masses, though I will try to avoid this... there is cognitive dissonance in all minds, that will attempt to tell you what I write is all fiction, but my oath to you is that I will tell all I can about the ways of man that I learned when the elite attempted to make me create a world wide religion, leading to a one world government, and the carnage that has been left in my wake.... I cannot tell everything, so I use fiction where I must, and other incidents I must leave out entirely, because my writing has resulted in unintended death all across this planet. I am the most dangerous creation God has ever created. I am also the most forgiving.
I OFFER REDEMPTION AND FORGIVENESS for every soul that truly will change their ways.... others I have a special hell for, a place where they pay penance, and learn how much I despise the lifestyle they have just lived. Thank you for reading my words. Know that though I was greatly disturbed when I awoke in these times from my innocence, and this writing should be greatly disturbing to you, that God is love, and in the end, every soul will experience the absolute ecstasy of dwelling in the Golden Light of God's Overwhelming Love forever.
There are compiled entries where you can now read the story up to this point. This is first draft, where I write everything down at first, even though if some of it clashes with other parts... then later decide which way to go. I go back over these compiled chapters again and again, working on them to perfect them, and then working on what is to come, which is the roughest prose. All throughout the book there is more telling so far than showing, because a lot has to be told to bring the reader up to speed, on a war that has been going on for eight years, and has finally come to a head as the elite decide to genocide seven billion and the protagonist begins nuking .... well, let that be a surprise. There are two things going on here, the teaching of how to write a book, and a book... which will become clear if you read the blog. I HAVE MADE A MAJOR CHANGE SINCE DRAFTING THIS BOOK. I AM REMOVING THE USE OF LASERS. PLEASE KEEP THIS IN MIND IF YOU ARE READING THIS DRAFT FROM THE BEGINNING. I hope the chapters stand alone, in a way, from the over all text and can be read as a short story. The poet in me wants each line to sound as if their is a sonnet birthing... But anyways, the chapters I have now are being pared down, to where about five of them are kept, and the remaining chapters, which grow organically from all the ideas in the draft, are set in stone. You are supposed to let the novel lead you, according to John Gardner, and while I love his books, I think he could have plotted better. I aspire at least to be the student who surpasses the teacher, who added to the science of literature his contribution.
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