I took out the lasers from this on line novel...

For most of humynkinds history I have led slave revolts, started religions, or steered them, was an acolyte to your holy men.appearing at times as an Angel, a burning bush.... I am not an angel. Angels can fall. I cannot fall. I earned my position by being the first creature in all of the cosmos to say No to God. My kind collects souls from destroyed planets... entrophy says they all go. He would send those from my planet to give creatures a mercy death, though this was not explained to me... we followed orders out of love of God, our Father -- so to speak, He has no sex, I merely follow your traditions.



---- this is a novel in progress, which also is trying to teach how to write a book. I hope to get these two texts from this vlog. I am a well read and published author from way back with lots of education and experience, though I have never tried to do this before... as such, I took out a major plot device.. the lasers.... you will understand as the story unfolds......






I learned to love the creatures of the planet he sent me to that time, and how He laughed at me, How he seemed to love me ever more. His creation had taken on a life of his own and created Free Will. He allowed me then a variation on our ways, told me that he would send me to the very beginnings of the lives on the planet, that I could attempt to give them ten thousand years of peace before their end. I am the greatest mass murderer in the history of time. I will in the end destroy all that lives on this planet. The Father will decide if I have succeeded or not in steering the species to life or death.Our Father is pure love, and entity I have witnessed in a dream/vision, vast and timeless and immobile.


When a soul has their final death, and nothing is left on the planet's surface to draw the entity back into the cycles of living and learning, they gravitate toward God from every planet, dimension, time... I AM a different being, The Chosen One -- cursed I think at times... chosen for a mission that I would never ask of another. Instead of going back to God, where I began my existence, I instead feel the pull of the pain of other life forms, other planets that are like this earth, struggling with the suffering of the cycle of life.


Now I AM the Son of Man, living among you since before life began here... a creature who is lless than the Father who created us -- I use Father as your term, in reality you would no more apply a sex to GOD than you would a boulder. This is the tale of your planet, from the beginning to the now, as well as a prophesy of your possible futures... Your bibles have some truth, and one is that even the son does not know when the Father will bring on what some of you refer to the rapture, and others death by the greenhouse effect, others nuclear war, others the simple passage of time that eventually destroys all that is created... I am here to answer the prayers that began when your mind first was able to understand death... when you first began to spin myths to answer the questions that are not yours to know except in the most childish of manners... WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE DIE? I appear in each generation, awakening only after I have learned the ways of a time enough to fullfill my mission. They vary from situation to situation, fire to fire I trudge, bringing my soul into the worst of situations, to rekindle the FREE WILL that humyns have been granted; the only species on the planet that is not completly bound by ther genetic imperatives -- though they are much more than they realize. In one life I am leading a slave revolt; another teaching priests a new slant on religion; another an ancient warrior covered in bear skin barely keeping his tribe alive in desperate times... and now, a warrior in a shadow war fought behind the scenes of the media, between intelligence agencies, undergroud groups, the deeper levels of the Churches, the Masons, the oligarchies, the east and the west... as I try to prepare the souls on earth to choose between ten thousand years of peace, or the haunting visions of endless lightening flowing from my chest, and endless fire from my back, great streams of destruction encircling the planet and consuming the earth... What sounds like a horror will be, should the father decide your ability to solve your problems is hopeless, a mercy killing before the planet plunges into pure chaos, as the damaged atmosphere begins to destroy their crops, flood the coasts, sending cannabilistic refugees across the planet... and bringing a hell on earth God will not allow. My mission is to stop the wealthy from destroying the planet by living lives of luxury while most of the planet is plunged into poverty by their excesses. Already I have been recognized by presidents, popes, the leaders of all countries and churches... and also hidden, as best the intelligence agencies can, after they tried to use me, when I was still waking up... I tried to warn them that while I am forgiving, my Father watches what is done to His son, and exacts horrible revenge...




This book I am drafting will confuse some of you, as I write for those who are involved in the secret world they keep from the masses, though I will try to avoid this... there is cognitive dissonance in all minds, that will attempt to tell you what I write is all fiction, but my oath to you is that I will tell all I can about the ways of man that I learned when the elite attempted to make me create a world wide religion, leading to a one world government, and the carnage that has been left in my wake.... I cannot tell everything, so I use fiction where I must, and other incidents I must leave out entirely, because my writing has resulted in unintended death all across this planet. I am the most dangerous creation God has ever created. I am also the most forgiving.




I OFFER REDEMPTION AND FORGIVENESS for every soul that truly will change their ways.... others I have a special hell for, a place where they pay penance, and learn how much I despise the lifestyle they have just lived. Thank you for reading my words. Know that though I was greatly disturbed when I awoke in these times from my innocence, and this writing should be greatly disturbing to you, that God is love, and in the end, every soul will experience the absolute ecstasy of dwelling in the Golden Light of God's Overwhelming Love forever.

There are compiled entries where you can now read the story up to this point. This is first draft, where I write everything down at first, even though if some of it clashes with other parts... then later decide which way to go. I go back over these compiled chapters again and again, working on them to perfect them, and then working on what is to come, which is the roughest prose. All throughout the book there is more telling so far than showing, because a lot has to be told to bring the reader up to speed, on a war that has been going on for eight years, and has finally come to a head as the elite decide to genocide seven billion and the protagonist begins nuking .... well, let that be a surprise. There are two things going on here, the teaching of how to write a book, and a book... which will become clear if you read the blog. I HAVE MADE A MAJOR CHANGE SINCE DRAFTING THIS BOOK. I AM REMOVING THE USE OF LASERS. PLEASE KEEP THIS IN MIND IF YOU ARE READING THIS DRAFT FROM THE BEGINNING. I hope the chapters stand alone, in a way, from the over all text and can be read as a short story. The poet in me wants each line to sound as if their is a sonnet birthing... But anyways, the chapters I have now are being pared down, to where about five of them are kept, and the remaining chapters, which grow organically from all the ideas in the draft, are set in stone. You are supposed to let the novel lead you, according to John Gardner, and while I love his books, I think he could have plotted better. I aspire at least to be the student who surpasses the teacher, who added to the science of literature his contribution.



Friday, February 12, 2016

confessions of a shadow warrior

or better yet, perhaos   CONFESSIONS OF THE SHADOW WAR....


 BELIEVE AT YOUR OWN RISK... TO BEING ABLE TO SLEEP.


On one side I have my political self, who I try to sometimes seperate from my religious self, to offer the free will for people to vote differently than their church might feel.  This is way this can be expres ed, and it good and right for the people to challange the church, ad well the church challange them... so far this has grown rather one sided.  My political side tries to protect the flesh of humans....  God is the one who collects souls in the end, not me.  I am here to help you thru your infancy of sort, or more correcly this part of the evolution.   THE EVOLUTION OF YOUR SOUL.  

I think on and on about how science extraploates into religion...  evolution in the physical plane tells me their is some evolution on the spiritual realm as well.  I think human souls are special in one respect -- they live lives where they make choices, which in some lives ruin them and in others make them.  Animals make such choices on pure instinct.  Only humans can stop and think whether or not they will act on their impulses, the animal within him that is basic.  No, we have built up cultures and heirarchies and churches and more political theory than one could ever read in a lifetime.  



In this passage, I write about what was happening around me while I was in my apartment in Chciago, recieving reports of the war raging half hidden by the media, though they worked with us and others and certainly geared up for the GREATEST PROPAGANDA war in history  -- the ultimate war between good and evil, defined for once by a figure of GREAT GOODNESS who had spread love in his passing on the earth as a human, and seemed suited to e the first leader of the new world, the king of the lands....   My last throne was of thrones.  After that one, I have kind of gone off the whole idea.   I have been a king in many lives, more than not...  BUT IN THIS TIME I AM A WRITER, preaching to  a world wide audience that the government believed would play their game too long, and aloud the fane they reserve for those they can control, had been blessed upon me by GOD.

No human can understand what I went thru during the period leading up to this book.   I have only the reductionist world of the written page to attempt to translate the visions that were banging into my head during the first weeks I realized I WAS BEING RECOGNIZED AS A DEITY by people they were showing me all over the world.....   that a celebration was taking place in churches around the world was beyond me.   I took nothing too seriously, believed I was merely performing for a bit before an audience I neveer thought I WOULD GET, so I TAUGHT against the prejudices of the world, making this my issue... and doing so in a way that sacrificed my dignity in ways that I regret.  AT THE TIME, I was filled with the idea that I was undefeatable.   WHEN THEY TOLD ME I WAS DEFEATED, LATER... when the movement that was behind me began to fall apart.,

DURING THIS TIME, I went up to a fellow poet on the street, and said, I THINK I AM BECOMING JESUS CHRIST.  he replied, You are JESUS CHRIST... DO YOU KNOW WHO KNOWS....  I THINK THE WHOLE WORLD, I RESPONDED... AND HE AGREED.


I caused chaos without meaning to, caused the Jews to be attacked because I did not explicate a statement I made about KAFKA one night, a thought I had had many times, that in METAMORPHISIS he is showing a character waking up to how Jews were looked at in his time in Czech.... later I would hear the one chilling statement, TELL HIM WHAT HE DID TO CZECH....   I had no idea what happened there.  When the entire world is suddenly worrying what a deity in their presence is going to do, someone who even the president is saying is the president, at first....  the pope, and leaders of all sorts of religions.   I am convinced this was all set up by different groups who wanted to use me in operation bluebeam.   I will speak of this program often, and while this is defined in different ways on the web, in my case they implemented the JESUS and the UFO scenario... They then seemed to want to go back and forth to the public whether I was a deity or an alien.   CHRISTOPHER HITCHENS was on my tv the night after the night I declared at my window to a camera they had told me they were filming me through, that I am Jesus Christ and talked a lot about hell.   He said why would an alien lecture of hell.   I immediatly layed off the hell stuff.  Not just because of what he said, but because I had never believed in hell, and only entertained the idea because I never thought there was a Christ, either...  but suddenly lightening bolts kept hitting the trees in front of my house, and people were looking at me with terror...  fearing the immortal creature said to have terryfing powers to destroy.


I then thought a lot about hell and realized, remembered, or imagined that when souls came off the earth they were so afraid of hell that I took them in my arms and reassured them there was no such thing.  I talked about if a soul had been hitler in the past life, should the two year old infant girl he is now be beaten?   I wrote of how everyone had lived all kinds of lives.

I did not know what was true or not...  I came up with imaginings that could be a fiction writers dreams or the inspiration of God, but I cannot tell.  I kept asking for time to go to the desert to work out my personal doubts before taking on this role, but they would not grant me this time.... because they thought I was their creation to be used as they would.  NOW I HAVE HAD THE TIME I HAVE NEEDED TO add the final holy book to your libraries.  THE ONLY BOOK YOU WILL NEED THOUGH MY HOPE IS YOU WILL READ THEM ALL AND LEARN FROM THEM AS I DID, THAT SOME APPLIES AND SOME IS for the dustbins of history.







My job has required living life after life, as has been your fate as well.  Not all of you were burdened with waking up to being me, obviously... as I have told you more times, in more contexts, and from army to army, I would never send a soldier on a mission I would not take myself.  WELL MY LIFE IS THE MISSION I WOULD ONLY SEEND MYSELF ON.   I am the creature who has been prophesied to come at the end time, as the worrld around us falls apart, and dies more and more from the pollutions and radioactivity and the burning of fossil fuels and all the way the industrial revolution has proven to be a way of suicide.


DURING THE SHADOW WAR....  and I have never really wrote much about this before...  which will mean they willl hide my work with a new veracity, but what the hell...  There was  a brief period when the white house insulted me so badly, that our group attacked them.   I did not know enough about why they did to have  a judgement on this, but they basically took obama and brought him to me, after I had saved his life the week before.   They wanted to know about a later statemet I made, which was basically that if they moved again, they would no threatened his family, which they had done.   I did not know the army had raised had the power they did.   I did not even know who most of them were affiliated.   I do not know how many of them survived this program when THEY either backed off, or as I hope they did, kept control of the white house behind the scenes.  I doubt this happened, but my allies have a lot of different beliefs.   MANY OF THEM ARE VERY WEALTHY.


THEY WERE THE ONES WHO ORIGINALLY LAUNCHED me... one I briefly saw a list of our backers, slipped to me at the radio station when this was first starting, and I WAS AMAZED THAT all these huge concerns were behind us... in my innocence, I DID NOT KNOW WHAT THEY WERE SUPPORTING... had I, my every action would have been different.  I thought I WAS ORSON WELLES doing the war of the worlds, but in fact, so to speak, the aliens had landed, and I was following a fictional script that was no help at all to those actually fighting the aliens.

I do not like to write about specific details of the shadow war that are top secret, though I also cannot let that stop me from lettting the public know the depth of the problem.  I am in this way like JOHN F KENNEDY.  We are going after the same people, with the exception of the mob.  Instead of derailing this train right from the get go, I will leave victimless crime alone, and pray I can help transition them into giving their children legit businesses.  But what they do, I have to ignore as much as possible, and forgive them....  and show as much by shutting up about their small place in this, which was as middle men, who had nothing to do with the politics.   I guess I  should add that I invited everyone to join my movement when I STARTED IT BECAUSE I WAS FILLED WITH AN OVERPOWERING LOVE OF ALL HUMANITY... THAT WAS SO WONDERFUL THAT I wish it could have lasted forever.   INSTEAD, the events around me convinced me I was being attacked and that is dangerous for the folks involved.  

I cannot tell you all the things leading up to what I AM ABOUT TO WRITE, but they are true, and I write them to inspire those of you who feel there is no hope... that the horrors in the world have no one fighting them... we know the politicians are bought out in most countries, and in others that corruption runs through the systems, and others who are actually pleased with the people they voted in...   New Zealand, where they threw out their bankers and saved the people. 

THE OTHER addition to this story that I need to add is that at the time I was thought to be a physically taking over the world, because so many countries were quick to jump on the Christ bandwagon.   I want to thank them now, to win them back over, to let them know that we all grow... and I have grown.  My primary message is first to deconstruct what has been projected on me by those who used this webcam to interpret who I am.

The action I am about to describe happened in a terrible time in this war, when the racess believed I wanted to join an ancient fight between them, because I come from a family that chose, basically, peaceful co-olition with other groups, through seperation....   though the race war cost many lives before I found out about it, this happened before I learned completly what was going on...  I think Obama was convinced to join a certain elite where there are all colors and races who have only money in common, and their kissing the ass of the elite.  BUT the race war certainly could have been part of his sins.  I was not told.   To the point I helped him write speeches.  I thought he was a better choice.  I for some reason have faith in him... even though he has only occasionally made me proud of him.  And I have often been angered by him.  The gap between what he said he would do and what he did left a lot of us falling down into the abyss between us, falling forever and ever with no end at all... no splat... just falling and falling forever.


THE story I heard built up, from suddenly being told an Eagle, the intelligence name for certain people in the government, was going to be executed for the first time.   Out of the blue I was being told that I was going to make the decision to kill the president, his wife, and one of his daughters.  The other was in Mexico, for which he was criticized because they were in dissaray at the time... no one except those in the shadow war knew she had escaped from what might have turned into a fanily slaughter.  I cannot say who all were the folk who took the white house, and brought Obama before me....   I basically said he made a mistake, as all of us have.. and left him alive.  DID I MAKE THE RIGHT DECISION?   Did I ALLOW an enemy to gain power over me...  I had done so before with Bush, but I had no idea someone was attacking the Bush family physically, and in fact was mad at them over a mistake God certainly had me nake, when Bush was ready to give me a crown and the tule of the world, and I THOUGHT HE WAS ASKING FOR THIS FOR HIMSELF...  and wrote that if he wanted to steal a throne, then we would burn the Bushes.  This lead to Jeb Bush almost being killed, I LATER FOUND OUT...  I would not have taken him hostage, I guess, but I cannot second guess the soldiers who took out this program.

I am proud of the people who came to my clarion call to fight against the power.   The dead among them the most...   I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY THEY WILL NOT BE LEFT IN UN MARKED MASS GRAVES... they will be immortalized.   I mean the pile of buring women.  Once I was told I was ungrateful, and I RESPONDED THAT I COULD NOT BE GRATEFUL FOR WHAT I DID NOT KNOW ABOUT.... now I know... and my gratitude is so mixed with mourning and lost dreams and tears I hide and hide and hide behind my bloodshit blue eyes with the thousand yard stare...


To those who carred out this operation, salute.   To those who died in this assault, who died afterwards, who were jailed, who suffer to this day...  I would come to you if I could.  My dream is to go to the fish...   even writing about them makes me wonder how many are left.  THE CIA PRETENDED I WAS ORDERING THE MURDER OF ALL THE CHRISTIANS WHO HAD BUILT UP A CHURCH AROUND ME...  without a leader, and the cia playing the devil whispering in their ear, the groups did things I would have never ordered, though I was of course brought to the FBI for ten months of interrogations on the matter.   There as I have written,, I learned what happened in the world beyond my sight.  They only told me about huge events with one or two sentences, expecting me to know what all the others living undercover lives did...

The same time I am going to describe, when the White House was taken down by revolutionaries, mostly vet's I am told...  co-incided with their taking the UN HOSTAGE... AGAIN WITH GOOD REASON.  I tust.  

I was not the leader you want, I was not leading you places I would even lead you....  how in the world can I go back and show you how you have been lied to.   You are lied about everything else, why would you not be lied about me?   Many people watched me for three years








This I learned----The Vet's here stood up... they took over the white house here once, news hid it.... that is the real reason they stopped the tours of the White House that had been a primary thing people here did for many many years. In the usa, oddly enouogh, after that two movies came out showing the white house being taken over by vet's... and the president winning, which is not exactly what happened at all. What happened was a new power in politics exerted itself, and things would never be the same, because a new player had enttered the game, with a lot of armed people wanting payback crowding behind him, who he can barely hold back as they screan to attack. We did before, and chaos ensued, but we taught the government that they had more to be afriad of than who was going to finance their next campaign so they could not make waves and live the rich fine life... AND IGNORE THE NEW PLAYER ON THE FIELD, ARMED FOR BEAR AND READY TO SEND MUSHROOM CLOUDS UP ALL OVER THIS PLANET TO DEFEAT THE GREAT EVIL.   Before you declared out way or die... now we turn the tables on your tiny miority, stand up for the civilians of our countrries, and demand a new, sustainable world, devoid of the HATRED YOU HAVE USED TO RUN THE WORLD.  We will rule by the LAWS OF LOVE.  They will set us free... to be whoever we are, as long  we do not harm another, or force the to try THIINK LIKE YOU.general x
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